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Showing posts from March, 2020

The emotional impact of dismissal on the adult PDA community

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The adult PDA community is bombarded with dismissal from multiple directions:

Official bodies and diagnosticians who, if they acknowledge PDA at all, exclude adults. Here is an exampleParents speaking over adult PDA voices in designated PDA support groups, and assuming that “PDA support” is for parents onlyAcademics such as Professor Jonathan Green, who argues that PDA is a falsehood propagated by parents misled by social media hype (link)Autistic theorists, such as Damian Milton (who argues that PDAers are autistics deemed pathological because they misfit society), and Richard Woods (who sees PDAers as gullible victims of what he terms "the autism industry"). Both views are critiqued here. Adult autistics arguing that PDA has no validity as an autism spectrum subtype. For example, I found this comment published on a public blog, “the main reason I reject PDA however (and I’m someone who formally self-identified as such) is that it divides autistic people in exactly the same …
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I want to speak about PDA and empathy.

There is an ideology in social culture that PDA creates challenging, violent children who, with or without intent, can be 'abusive' both to other humans and to animals. My son, on past occasions, has been labelled by people who don't know him as uncaring towards other children, or malicious.

Anyone with a close family member, or friend, who has PDA will no doubt have first-hand experience, have read posts in support groups, or read articles on the internet discussing violent or 'challenging' behaviour caused by their high anxiety. I want to completely switch that image around.

This week, very sadly,  my son and I had to have one of our pet rats put to sleep. He cried lots of tears. It would be easy to say that he was just thinking of himself, but no, he wasn't, although of course he was going to really, really miss her.

He babied and cuddled her often whilst she was unwell, and he held her in his arms very gently, telling …

Identity

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If I identify as PDA,  and some 'diagnosed' don’t like it.  I just say – get on ya way I could not care one bit
But reality is, that I do mind Because it makes me less inclined To be the me I'm wired to be
I mask in class I mask on task I’m holding it all in  You can’t see how my avoidance  Is taking toll within
It is obvious to me  That I have ADHD But as I am yet to get the proof and until that comes, does that mean I'm just a goof
These things are me, my identity it’s not yours to question that is my suggestion.
Rejection sensitivity, creates a fear in me That I’m not your cup of tea A part of me couldn’t care less Another part feels intense distress 
So, when my identity is discussed You really must Include me You seee… You don’t know my inner world Like I do not know yours Our Neurodiversity may be similar, by definition, but personalities shape us too to make our composition
The group is for others like me that could not pay the fee to get that certification of proof to prove you are not a spoof
that…