3 decades!

I feel a sense of pride going on here for the Free PDA community.

I continue with my thoughts about self identity and wonder whether this is a common theme in the childhood years for us? My "problems" of insecurity started from about the age of 12, got bad in my early 20s and really bad from my late 20s.  I think it wasn't until I hit my 40s that I suddenly became comfortable with myself. 3 flipping decades of worry, insecurity, shame and anxiety. Some say that this is a common thing in this decade as people tends to care less about what others think of them. Hmmmm I am not sure. It wasn't until I had my ADHD recognised that I truly feel at ease with myself and realised that all that overanalysing was sure to a hyperactive brain and an intolerance of uncertainty. Fuck! Decades! 3 decades to work that out!!!! 30 fucking years! haha!!!

I won't share all my thoughts here because I am at serious risk of oversharing but self identity and overthinking, overanalysing has been a trouble of mine. I think there was a high level of OCD in there too. And Rejection Sensitivity - blimey! I wish I had known about that years ago!

My self identity exists alongside ADHD. They are not separate but together. I think.

I am not sure I could have come to this place of security without finding my tribe online though.

For me, I think my demand avoidance is heavily linked with my ADHD and I am really interested in the role of dopamine in PDA - I'll have to do some more raising to continue with that one.

One in the net! Who's next? haha!!!!


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